As a pageant contestant, I've learned that the lessons we embrace aren't just for pageant girls—they're for everyone. These insights apply to all girls, women, men, anyone. Physical health and appearance are relevant to everyone, and the concepts I’m addressing can resonate universally.
Whether your goals involve abs, muscle, a bikini body, or a strong physique, it's important to remember that shape, size, and color are subjective. "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"—a cliché, perhaps, but undeniably true. Society often prioritizes outward beauty over inward health, but we must change this narrative. There's no true health without mental health, and a healthy mind is essential for a healthy relationship with our bodies and physical health.
The Mental Health Toll of Prioritizing Skinny Over Healthy
Emotional Well-being: The pressure to lose weight can lead to emotional distress and decreased self-esteem when unrealistic goals aren't met. Our value becomes tied to the number on a scale or the size on a tag, overshadowing the genetic factors that influence our body shape and size. Your body is a reflection of your culture, history, and identity—wear it with pride.
Social Isolation: An obsession with dieting and weight loss can lead to social withdrawal, as we avoid gatherings for fear of breaking our diet or being judged. This isolation impacts mental health due to a lack of meaningful relationships and shared experiences.
Relationship with Food: Focusing solely on weight loss can lead to an unhealthy relationship with food, including restrictive eating or binge eating. The pursuit of control can spiral into harmful eating habits, from overindulgence to severe restriction, damaging both physical and mental health.
Body Image: Obsessing over weight loss can distort body image, leading to body dysmorphia and dissatisfaction regardless of actual weight. The media's lack of body diversity perpetuates unrealistic standards. As role models, we must be transparent with our appearance to promote a realistic narrative and combat these harmful perceptions.
Quality of Life: Extreme focus on achieving a physical appearance goal can detract from overall quality of life, limiting enjoyment of social activities, hobbies, and daily pleasures. It can also lead to eating disorders, which are among the most life-threatening mental illnesses.
The Bigger Picture: Health Beyond Weight
The National Institutes of Health conducted a 15-year, $15 million study and found no conclusive evidence that therapeutic diets and weight loss reduce the risk of strokes, heart attacks, or heart disease. Exercise, regardless of weight change, lowers health risks. Satisfaction with your body correlates with better health outcomes, regardless of weight. Research from the Adverse Childhood Experiences Study suggests that the roots of chronic diseases like diabetes, cancer, and heart disease may lie in childhood. Being mindful of common thinking errors is crucial for maintaining mental health and a positive self-image.
Overcoming Common Thinking Errors
All-or-nothing thinking: Avoid extreme judgments of yourself and your body. Recognize the gray areas and strive for balance.
"Should" Statements: Avoid comparing yourself to "perfect" images in the media. Remember, you have choices and agency over your life. Examples of "should" statements include "I should look like this".
Magnification/minimization: Don’t over-focus on your perceived flaws while ignoring your strengths. Accept compliments graciously and skip the "but."
Emotional reasoning: Just because you feel something doesn't make it true. Identify your feelings and remind yourself that thoughts are not facts.
In conclusion, true health is holistic, encompassing physical, mental, and emotional well-being. By shifting our focus from outward appearance to inward health, we can cultivate a more positive, inclusive, and realistic understanding of beauty and wellness. Let’s prioritize mental health, embrace our unique bodies, and support each other on this journey to holistic health.
My Story:
I know some of you may be thinking, "You’re a twig, easy for you to say." But I have struggled with self-image and weight. In high school, I was incredibly depressed and anxious, which led to excessive vomiting and minimal eating. I didn't hit 100 pounds until my junior year of high school, and it was something I constantly strived for. I had no butt or breasts and prayed to gain weight so people would stop spreading rumors about my appearance.
After high school graduation, I stayed naturally thin despite eating poorly and never working out. Climbing stairs left me winded. From the outside looking in, people assumed I was fit because I was skinny, but I was far from healthy. When I won my first title, at my first luncheon, a waitress was in utter shock that I didn't shy away from the bread, butter, non-Diet Coke, and clearing my plate. While she meant well by commending my eating habits, it felt insulting. The pageant world has become stereotyped for eating disorders and unhealthy eating habits.
A year after winning the title, I was over five pounds heavier. I continued gaining weight as I approached 22 years old, filling out into a woman’s body. I could no longer eat carelessly and remain tiny. Now, ten pounds heavier than when I originally won, insecurity drowned my self-confidence with feelings of inadequacy due to my additional curves. I then dieted extremely hard and punished myself at the gym for the way I looked and therefore felt. Thoughts influence our feelings, which influence our behavior (therefore so important to manage).
Eventually, I got back to being only five pounds heavier than when I won Miss Tampa. I look like a healthy woman, not overly skinny or malnourished as I did in high school (when I was praised most for my figure). Now I compete in a pageant system with a fitness portion meant to highlight heart health through a partnership with the American Heart Association. It’s hard not to compare myself, thinking, "I am not the skinniest or the most proportionate."
But I remind myself if I were to somehow attempt to become the skinniest, I would have to adopt unrealistic and unhealthy daily habits that might make me thinner but would lead to the opposite of health, both physically and mentally.
As I prepare for June’s competition, I remind myself that I am a role model for young people. I don’t need to be "the ideal" body type. I need to be a realistic body type that emphasizes what is truly important: holistic health, mental health, and physical health—not just being skinny.
Therefore, I am on a reasonable diet, making intentional choices to eat better and live healthier, not just to be skinnier. I also indulge in what makes me happy in moderation. I love treating myself to an ice cream Snickers bar at the end of the day as a reward for my workout and conscious food choices. As a judge of the competition, it is hard to assess fitness beyond appearance, but I hope to advocate for a mental health-based approach, showing how mental health can lead to better physical health.
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